Strength in Numbers

Have you seen the video of the little girl who is gifted with a three-legged puppy? Her heart beams out of her eyes and arms as she lovingly welcomes the wiggling dog’s kisses. The camera slowly zooms out to reveal that the little girl is also missing a leg. There’s an instant realization that her joy isn’t just in finding a friend, but in finding one who totally understands her.

That’s what this community is designed to do for each of us. We all share the incredible, yet terrifying, privilege of caring for a loved one with a traumatic brain injury. We come from all corners of the world, of varying races and faiths, every economic bracket, and up and down the TBI spectrum. And we get each other. We know the periods of mourning a life that should have been. We know the joys that come with eyes that begin to open, or feet that take a first post-injury step. And we often feel alone and misunderstood.

“We all share the incredible, yet terrifying, privilege of caring for a loved one with a traumatic brain injury...We get each other.”

My husband went to a rehabilitation facility following his 17-day stay in trauma ICU. A social worker there connected me with Susan, whose husband had been at the same rehab hospital two years earlier. Susan and I met over coffee and filled two hours with tears and laughter. I knew I had just met a friend for life.

Dana was pushing her husband around the halls of the nursing home where my husband now resides. I could tell from her spouse’s curled hands and lopsided smile that he was a brain injury patient. And I knew the look on her face - trepidation and hope trying to eek out a living together. I reached out to her immediately and she’s now one of my closest friends.

Susan, Dana and I understand each other on an invisible plain. Susan showed me that I could get through the teenage years with my children, and I believed her because she had been there ahead of me. I showed Dana that she could advocate for her husband and she believed me because she saw me doing the same thing. All three of us learned perseverance from each other.

Are you wandering the TBI world alone? Are you looking for a place of understanding, where you can safely vent your frustrations and ask sensitive questions? Are you scared? I’m here for you….we are all here for each other. You are welcome here.

You are braver and more capable than you’ve ever been before. Keep pressing on and know that you can, and will, succeed in your role as a TBI Caregiver.

God speed,

Melanie